Grief

Grief leaves a big hole in our soul and it’s evidence of our love. We try and build a bridge over the hole. It’s always there. Sometimes we feel it. Sometimes we’re numb. It changes us and feeling it is a way to honor and pay tribute to our lost loved ones.

Observe your emotion. Acknowledge that it exists, stand back and see it for what it is. It’s an emotion.

Experience it like a wave – little waves hitting your feet as you're standing on the shoreline.

Concentrate on the emotion in your body. Imagine that this wave is just coming and going – don’t try to push it away and don’t judge it. It just is. It’s not a bad emotion, it’s not a bad experience. Become this anthropologist of your emotional experience where you are just watching and noticing what’s happening to you and you say, “Hum, interesting. Here’s what it’s like. It’s okay to feel this. This is a valid experience.” At the same time, I don’t want you to hang onto the emotion. Just watch it. Watch it like a cloud passing by. Watch it like waves flowing. Don’t rehearse it over and over to yourself, don’t escalate it, don’t make it bigger.

Let it be. You observe it, you don’t judge it, you don’t try to push it away.

Remember, you're not your emotion. Your emotion is part of you but it is not who you are.

Practice loving the emotion. I know that this is a difficult concept, but imagine loving the experience and saying, “Thank you for what you can teach me. I honor the message you have for me. I know you are going to serve my highest good. I’m going to learn something from you. I'm going to grow from you. I may not like this right now, but I'm having you because it’s for my higher good.” It’s getting very transcendental. We are transcending the experience by doing that.

Remember that acceptance and love are two different things. You don’t have to like the experience, but you can accept it and embrace it.

Want more?

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♥️ My Therapy thoughts are for educational purposes only and are not a replacement for a therapeutic relationship or individualized mental health or medical care.

Therapy and tacos for all,

T. Roe